Do not blame the lettuce!
When you plant lettuce, don’t blame the lettuce if it doesn’t grow well. Look into the reasons why it’s not doing well! Maybe it needs fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You don’t blame the lettuce! (The well-known spiritual teacher, Thich Nhat Hanh is credited with this lesson!)
Yet when we have problems with our friends or our family, we often blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well-just like the lettuce.
Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade by means of reason or argument. (At least, that has been my experience!)
Being alert to the necessity for balancing the need for “fertilizer, water and/or sun” can help us come to understand the situation and the person. And with that understanding comes love and the opportunity for growth and blessings.
Now, if you are the lettuce…blame, reason, argument still don’t help you!
Very often we are harsh with ourselves, when we wouldn’t be with our friends. We need to treat ourselves as well as we would treat our best friend.
We are our own “lettuce” as well as the gardener for our patch of friends and life experiences with others.
So…
- let’s be kind,
- let’s be gentle, and
- let’s be smart.
And, just maybe, we can remember that we are not really in charge!
1 Comment
Love your post, and I love the idea of remembering to be yourself.
Love and light