Difference of opinion?
Want to diffuse a heated discussion? Here are four words that are easy, not fancy, that you can use to shift the conversation:
“You might be right.”
This can accomplish a number of things:
- It admits that maybe they are right. You do make mistakes. Maybe you did something wrong. Maybe you don’t know everything you might need to know about the topic. Do you wish they hadn’t brought it up? Sure, but just because they may be a jerk doesn’t mean they are wrong.
- It can end the conversation right there.
- And you don’t have to carry it around all day.
It’s over. You’re done. They might be right. Maybe they’re not…but you didn’t say “You are right.” You said “You might be right.”
After all, there is really nothing more important than our peace of mind. How we are feeling and what we are thinking throughout the day is what really matters, where our energy is flowing. Protecting our mental state is our goal, not having to be seen as “right.”
We can always just be quiet on the matter. This will get us quickly to the end of that topic and we can then change the subject to something better to discuss.
We can always say “I never thought about it that way” as a soft response that doesn’t encourage argument.
We are not trying to change, reform, improve, or fix them. We are not trying to prove them wrong.
When we meet the inevitable challenging person on our path, we don’t need to meet them as an adversary, but rather as a possible teacher.
By pushing our buttons, by blocking our path, they can help us (unwittingly!) discover thoughts in our minds or feelings in our hearts that we may not have been aware of. And once we become aware, we can choose to change them or not.
So, do you agree or not? What are your thoughts?
After all, you might be right!
5 Comments
“Maturing is realizing how many things don’t require your comment.”
Love it! Now that Jim and I are dining in a communal setting, I find numerous opportunities to practice a silent “no comment” to sentiments I will not discuss.
Only when I hear an outright untruth (lie) do I speak up and provide the truth, explaining how and why I know the truth. This happened recently, ending the discussion.
I remember that facts don’t care about feelings, even while making sure that I am careful to respect the honest feelings of others.
Meg, your awareness of the choices we have to respond or not gives you an edge in either ending or shifting a discussion. Sounds like you get a number of opportunities to use it!
“I never thought about it that way” is one of my favorite quotes of Sandy. So useful sometimes!
Hoo boy! I’ve still got some maturing to do!
I use you might be right a good share of the time with my husband. Works well for us in preventing arguments.