Posts by Pat:
When “why” is the wrong question
Our brain loves to solve problems. It functions beautifully to figure out how to make a pumpkin pie, sail across oceans, or build a house. It’s a wonderful tool for creativity.
But if we are trying to understand ourselves, find a way out of suffering, it can derail us because our minds get caught in the process of figuring out why.
Do these sound familiar?
- Why am I feeling this way?
- Why did this happen to me?
- Why did I do that again?
Asking “why” is our mind’s attempt to make sense of things. The “why” question stimulates our mind to keep searching for stories and explanations.
Right now, ask yourself a why question like “why am I feeling this way?”
Then notice what your mind does. It tries to come up with reasons to answer the question of why. Rather than focusing on what needs to shift, you’re trying to research the why.
So…
We could forget about asking why and instead ask questions that bring our attention to our right-now experience and see what our mind does with that.
- What is most important to me right now?
- What can I do differently?
- How can I help?
- What can I surrender right now that isn’t serving me?
We can feel the difference because these type of questions open us to the expansiveness of the moment and the choices we could be making instead of looking back and trying to figure out “why.” Our brain does want to answer our questions!
So today, instead of looking for reasons as to why things are the way they are, we can try asking ourselves how we’d love it to be, what we would need to do.
We do live in a responsive universe. Asking a different question can generate a new energy in our hearts and minds. This is a new cause and new effects are on the way!
To paraphrase an important saying,
Have YOU ever found this small shift help you change your experience?
3 lessons from a squirrel +1 extra
Squirrels are a lowly rodent to some people, but to admirers they are high flying acrobats, fuzzy tailed philosophers, scampering tree huggers, and resourceful survivors. (The are also awfully cute!) Here are 3 (+1 extra!) life lessons we can learn from our squirrel friends. We all know the easy one: to save for the future! The […]
That elusive balance
The opposite of stressed is calm and balanced, right? Work, kids, life, money, time, energy…if we could just balance it all. But balance is actually a state of constant motion. Think of a tightrope walker, a plate spinner, a bicycle rider, or a gymnast on a balance beam. If they stop moving, just stand still, […]
What is the Ben Franklin effect?
You may know a lot about Benjamin Franklin-for example, that he invented bifocals, graces the $100 bill, and experimented on electricity with a kite and a key. But you may never have heard of the Ben Franklin effect that was even cited in Dale Carnegie’s book “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” In a nutshell: […]
More word play!
Oxymorons are fun to play with! (after all, I am an ex-English teacher!) Ever wondered about such phrases as… icy burn? fight for peace? definitely maybe? How about … government organization? act naturally? open secret? Why do we use phrases that don’t seem to make logical sense? For one reason, they are fun! Oscar Wilde […]
Serenity or Senility Prayer?
We all know the basic Serenity Prayer, but have you tried one of tweaked ones? Here are some…and you may know of others! My favorite one (which I couldn’t find an image for) is “God, grant me the serenity to accept there are things I’ve no time to read, time to read the things I […]
Book Power!
Enjoy this delightful poem originally written for the 50th Anniversary of our National Children’s Book Week in 1969. I like it! BOOK POWER by Gwendolyn Brooks BOOKS FEED AND CURE AND CHORTLE AND COLLIDE In all this willful world of thud and thump and thunder man’s relevance to books continues to declare. Books are […]
A little bit of wisdom…
Taken from a friend’s collection, these thoughts as images can make a good impression on our minds. Recognize any of them? All of them? Here are 11 of my favorites. Which one is your favorite? […]
Productive procrastination?!
We’ve all decried it, denied it, defied it. But most of us continue to see procrastination as the bane of our lives. But did you know? Researchers now suggest that wasting a bit of time here and there can actually be good! When used correctly, procrastination helps us think creatively and make informed decisions. After all, historically speaking, it […]
Disney-smart or stupid?
A maverick writer, James Altucher who coined the 5 x 5 Rule said that Walt Disney was the “stupidest person in the room.” (or, maybe turned out to be the smartest in the room!) Why? Because he was smart enough to stand next to his brother Roy (who kept Walt positive after their first business went […]